control

I'm paying dearly for past mistakes

I felt as if things were becoming a bit clearer earlier on, but can now see everything falling to pieces before my eyes

I never realised how one mistake in my life some three or four years ago would make me feel how I do ?

I struggle between what I know is right in my own mind, and some warped truthfulness as seen through other people's eyes. Who have no heart, and can't see the difference anyway.

The struggle between man's conscience and his heart until things go too far. get out of hand, and can never be repaired.

Is everything so worthless in the end ? Is there any more ?

What lies beyond ? What is left to carry on ?

last few days, i feel so sin

it mostly at that time i was very drunk and bloody messy, that thing we often do, things that make you ask,

what's wrong with them? I don't understand, but when I woke up and realized,

I was promised I would not do it again but when I met the fuckin' flock , I do it again.

and woke up again and then realized again and do it again. fake's sake !

“If you wish to be a success in the world, promise everything, deliver nothing.”

Napoléon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

Does God exist ?

Did God create everything that exist?

If God create everything that exist,

then He create the evil

which mean God is Evil

But..

Does cold exist?

In fact, cold does not exist

According to the laws of physics,

what we consider cold

is in reality the absence of heat

Does darkness exist?

darkness not exist either

Darkness is in reality the absence of light

Light we can study, but not darkness

Evil does not exist

It is just like darkness and cold

God did not create evil

Evil is the result of what happens

when man does not have God’s love

present in his heart

Albert Einstein

1879-1955

*thanks God, when I approached and tried to enjoy physics, You just give it.

ketika aku mendapati iblis dalam cermin kamarku

ketika aku menikmati bluesku mengalun sunyi
hingga kini aku dapati kembali iblis dalam
malam ini sekarang kepalaku berat tak karuan.